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Just Here for the Pain

by K.A. Merikan


Sid. Drummer for The Underdogs. Secretly yearning for pain and submission.

Asher. AKA Stan. Stalker. More than meets the eye.

It’s hard to find good hookups while on tour. Sid wants pain, humiliation, and the kind of sex that isn’t easy to get from one-night stands. So for now, he’s given up, settled for an online Dom to get his rocks off, and focused on his band instead. The Underdogs are getting increasingly popular, but there is one fan who has followed Sid since before he even joined the band, and he’s driving Sid mad! Rich, spoiled hipster bratlooking for the bad boy experience. If he knew what Sid was really into, he would run for the hills.

Asher is convinced that Sid is The One, his One True Love, his endgame. Years ago, Asher lost his virginity to Sid, and from that moment on, he knew it was meant to be. They had a spark, that honest connection that couldn’t be faked. The members of Sid’s band call him a stalker, but all he wants is to offer Sid his love. When Sid finally chokes out what he wants, Asher is more than ready to unleash it on him.

But the last time Sid was out as gay and submissive, he got badly burnt when his former band kicked him out, and the doors to many opportunities slammed in his face. Asher wants the whole world to know that he’s dating Sid. Problem is, Sid would much rather keep the relationship as pain-with-benefits.


Themes: rock band, alternative lifestyles, tattoos, BDSM, commitment, family issues, coming out, life on tour, friends with benefits become something more, first love, stalking, fanboy

Genre: Contemporary M/M Rocker Romance

Heat level: Scorching hot, explicit BDSM scenes

Length: ~90,000 words (Can be read as standalone, HEA)

This book is on:
  • 4 To Be Read lists
  • 3 Read lists
Publisher: Independently Published
Cover Artists:
Pairings: M-M
Heat Level: 5
Romantic Content: 5
Ending: Click here to reveal
Character Identities: Gay
Protagonist 1 Age: 18-25
Protagonist 2 Age: 26-35
Tropes: Coming Out / Closeted, Enemies to Lovers, Famous / Not Famous, Find Love and Come Out, Hurt / Comfort, Most Mindblowing Sex Ever, Opposites Attract, Out for You, Rescue, Second Chances, Sex Buddies Become Lovers
Word Count: 90500
Setting: California
Languages Available: English
Series Type: Same Universe / Various Characters
Reviews:Mirrigold on Mutterings and Musings wrote:

“This book is epic! (…) OMG it just ticked every single one of the boxes I didn’t even know I needed ticking until I read it.”

Lorraine Lesar on Reviews for Book Lovers wrote:

“The whole book is a game of contrasts between how the characters look and how they are in the inside. The couple -not just them as individuals- is a rainbow of infinite colors. Both so different at first sight but so looking for the same needs. There’s a perfect union between two apparently different men. Grown in very different families, beliefs and backgrounds but with those differences driving both to the same place. A spot full of freedom and trust.”

About the Author

K.A. Merikan are a team of writers who try not to suck at adulting, with some success. Always eager to explore the murky waters of the weird and wonderful, K.A. Merikan don’t follow fixed formulas and want each of their books to be a surprise for those who choose to hop on for the ride.

K.A. Merikan have a few sweeter M/M romances as well, but they specialize in the dark, dirty, and dangerous side of M/M, full of bikers, bad boys, mafiosi, and scorching hot romance.